Ask A Linguist FAQ: Bilingual and Multilingual Children

Ask A Linguist FAQ



Bilingual and Multilingual Children:
Two Perspectives


First Perspective , by Deborah D.K. Ruuskanen

Second Perspective
, by Anthea Fraser Gupta
  • Can my baby learn two or more languages at home?
  • Will my child be bilingual? Will bilingualism affect my child's intelligence?
  • Will hearing me speak more than one language confuse my child? Should I use the one-parent-one-language method?
  • Is the speech of bilingual children delayed?
  • I am worried that my child will learn my faulty pronunciation.
  • My child refuses to speak our native language.

  • More Resources






    First Perspective

    Answers provided by Deborah D.K. Ruuskanen, Professor of English Linguistics at the University of Vaasa, Finland, and mother of three bilingual children.


    Can my new baby learn two or more languages at home?


    Similar questions:
    Can my toddler learn a second language at home before starting school?
    My spouse speaks language X and I speak language Y, can we teach our children both languages?
    My infant is a year old and has not learned to talk. Why not?
    Will I confuse my child if I mix languages?

    Yes. It is entirely possible to teach an infant two or even three languages, and four is not unheard of. In Europe, a great many toddlers learn four languages with little or no difficulty. The main requirements for this learning are: the parents speak only their mother-tongue to the child; the child has some reason to learn the languages (motivation); and there is reinforcement of some kind for these languages, preferably outside the home. If the language of the environment is a third language, then the child will easily learn the third language once they start playing with neighbourhood children.

    There appears to be a 'window' of learning language that 'opens' at about the age of ten months. Infants can hear much earlier, of course, and there is some evidence that they can even hear in the womb. It is clear that they will begin to imitate the 'noises' they hear, and when there is a reaction from their caregivers, they begin to associate meanings with the sounds. Over the next two years, infants acquire language at an astonishing rate. By the age of three, they have acquired basic syntax (sentence structure), basic grammar (the 'rules' of the language), and a large vocabulary of basic words necessary to their physical and emotional survival. Their motivation to talk with their caregivers is high: asking for something usually results in being given the thing they need. Similarly, when the infant begins to play outside, with other children, then the motivation to talk to these children is high, and the infant will try to learn the language of play. Later on, at school, the language of the school will be important, too.

    THE IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER IS THAT EACH CHILD IS AN INDIVIDUAL, and that each child will learn when they are ready to learn. If you think your child is 'late' learning to talk, be sure you have ruled out all possible physical causes, including possible deafness, and then just wait. Especially if there is more than one language in the baby's home environment, then the baby will be learning first to process and separate the different languages, before talking begins. This 'separating the languages process' is why it is important that each parent speaks only their mother-tongue to the baby. They can speak a third language among themselves if they want the baby to hear and become familiar with that language as well, but it is important that the baby hears native-speaker sounds if you want the baby to make native-speaker sounds.

    There is considerable debate among linguists as to when the 'language learning window' closes, if it closes at all. However, there does seem to be an 'optimal' age for language learning, when the child's mind is still open and flexible, and not cluttered with all sorts of other learning, not to mention the society's views on which languages are 'prestige' languages, and which ones are regarded by the society as of little or no importance. The latter affects motivation: children will be admired for speaking a 'prestige' language, and teased and bullied for speaking a 'non-prestige' language. When the mind is being taught many many other things than language, there is less 'processing space' left for language learning. At the moment, the 'optimal' time for learning a second language appears to be 'at the same time as the first language', i.e. in the home beginning at birth to three years (providing the parents speak these two languages as their mother tongue). The next best time for learning a second, third, and even a fourth language, appears to be between the ages of two to seven years. A third period for learning a second language is from about ten to thirteen years of age, this is in cases when the second language is not the language of either the parents or the environment. This is the reason behind the push to introduce 'foreign' language learning into the curriculum of elementary schools, in the grade when the child is about ten-eleven years old.

    Parents who want their children to learn their mother-tongue must realise that it will take work, beyond simply speaking their mother-tongue all the time to the child. Especially if the spouse speaks another language, which is the language of the environment, the parent speaking the 'minority' language will have to be sure that there is sufficient input for the child to learn and reinforce what has been learned. This means things like reading out loud (this should go on until the child learns to read on their own, and for a few years afterwards until the child says stop), singing to them and teaching them songs and nursery rhymes, showing video films in the parent's language (radio is not as good as there are no visual clues), and having other adults or children talk to the child in this language (grandparents are invaluable here). Taking the child to visit in a country where the parent's language is the language of the environment is also a good idea, if it is practical: sending the child to spend time with grandparents at about the age of eleven or twelve is also a good idea, for many reasons. This is probably a good place to remind parents that a multilingual environment is also a multicultural environment, and that it is very difficult if not impossible to separate language from culture. Without a context (culture) for the language, the child will have difficulty making sense of the meanings underlying the words.

    Parents should make sure the child has a firm grounding in the parents' own languages before trying to teach a third language. This should if possible include learning to read and write in at least one of those two languages. Some countries in Europe offer children in the early grades of elementary school the possibility to learn to read and write in their 'home' language: parents should check if this is possible in their local schools. Parents who want to teach their child to read at home should remember that linguists think it is impossible to teach a child to read before they have learned to talk: first the child learns a system of sounds that have meaning, and how to put these 'meaning' sounds together in a larger system; then the child learns a system of symbols (letters or ideograms) that have the same meanings as the sounds and/or combinations of sounds. A phonetic system of learning to read is preferred by many linguists, for languages that have alphabets. Teach the child the sounds of the letters first, then teach 'sounding out' the words from the letters. Simply reading aloud to a child while holding the child in your lap and putting your fingers under the big letters in a picture book, or under the words in a storybook, is one method of teaching a young child to read. It is rare that a child learns to read under the age of four. Writing can be taught at the same time as reading, or after the child has learned to read: begin with making separate letters, and the first written word taught is usually the child's own name.

    Problems will arise when the child starts playing with neighbourhood children who do not speak the language the parent is trying to teach them. This is the stage when a lot of parents give up. The child does not want to be 'different' from their playmates, and speaking a 'foreign' language certainly makes you different. If the parent refuses to answer the child, or to give them what they want until they ask for it in the parent's 'own' language, the process of learning the language will continue. Some parents make an agreement to talk to the child in the language of the playmates when the playmates are around, and the 'home' language when only family is 'home': personally I think this does not work well. The problems will increase when the child starts kindergarten. The parent must keep speaking only their 'own' language with the child, or the child will lose the language.

    At this point, the question of putting the child in a 'foreign' language school comes up. This is a hard decision to make, especially if the child is already 'different' because their mother or father is a 'foreigner', because taking a child away from neighbourhood playmates and putting then in a different school will make them even more different, and more likely to be teased and bullied by the neighbourhood children. Having said that, putting a child in a 'foreign' language school will certainly ensure that they learn that language. For example, a child living in Sweden, whose father speaks only Portuguese to them, and whose mother speaks only Finnish to them, and who is put in an English school, will learn Swedish, Portuguese, Finnish, and English. However, if this child grows up and goes to university in England, and has little or no contact with Finnish relatives, then the Finnish will almost certainly be lost. Languages need to be spoken, or they will be lost.

    Teaching a child a language that is not the mother-tongue of either parent is usually not a good idea. Unless the parents are completely bilingual themselves, that is, they speak two languages as native languages, then the sounds that are produced for the child to imitate will be tinged with a strong 'foreign accent'. Similarly, unless the parent speaks the non-native language exceptionally well, then the child will learn the mistakes that parent makes in that language. Finally, and perhaps more important, teaching a third language that the parent does not know well will confuse the child unnecessarily. Wait until the baby has mastered the native languages of both parents well enough to be able to have long, meaningful conversations (about five years old) and has begun to play with other children, before deciding about introducing a language that the parents do not speak well. Remember that the child will learn the language of the environment and the school even without input from the parents. Trying to teach the child an artificial language, such as Klingon or Elvish, for example, can be done only if both parents speak it well enough to converse in it daily where the child can hear them. Again, this must be considered a 'third' language, and teaching it is best done only after the child has learned the parents' languages well. Children who do not use this 'artificial' language in their teen years will almost certainly lose it, since as said above, languages need to be spoken or they will be lost.

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    Suggestions for further reading

    For Parents and Teachers
    For those of you who want more information on this subject, a list of books with a comment or two on their content is presented below. This is by no means an exhaustive list, just those books I have read.

    • A Parents' and Teachers' Guide to Bilingualism, by Colin Baker. 2nd Edition, 2000. ISBN: 1853594555.

      Probably the most useful of all the books on this list. The style is that of a FAQ sheet, i.e. questions people have actually asked, followed by Colin Baker's answers. Written in clear, straightforward, plain English. Includes identity problems multilingual children might have, language 'mixing' (you speak one language, the child speaks another, and you converse this way), the influence of the Internet on bilingualism, benefits for children who have a second language that is not as strong as their first language, language strategies to use with adopted children, employment and bilingualism, etc. You might want to actually buy this one if you can find it.


    • The Bilingual Family: A Handbook for Parents, by Edith Harding and Philip Riley. Cambridge University Press, 1986. ISBN: 0521311942 (still in print).

    • This is primarily a book for parents who are trying to decide whether or not to bring up their children as bilingual, and there is not much concrete advice on how to do this. In that sense, the book is definitely not a 'handbook'. The book presents the stories (case histories) of sixteen bilingual families (Indo-European languages), with the different ways they handled the problem of bilingualism. There is also a chapter on linguistic theory regarding bilingualism. As a university lecturer, I have to say this book reads like a university lecture, but if you are still debating on whether or not to raise your (unborn?) children as bilinguals, you'd probably benefit from reading it.

    • Encyclopedia of Bilingualism and Bilingual Education, edited by Colin Baker and Sylvia Prys Jones. 1998. ISBN: 1853593621.

    • Lots and lots and lots and lots of fascinating data. A very expensive reference book you should try to get your local library to buy. A good book to raise awareness about the diversity of language in the world. Points out, for example, that nearly two-thirds of all the inhabitants of the world are bilingual. Four sections: individual bilingualism; languages in society; languages in contact; and bilingual education.

    • Growing Up with Two Languages: A Practical Guide, by Una Cunningham-Andersson and Staffan Andersson. 1999. ISBN: 041521257X.

    • Case history of Swedish-English family living in Sweden, where English is a prestige language understood by large numbers of Swedes. Not much use for parents who speak a minority language in a country where they are not going to get outside reinforcement for that language, although it does emphasise being consistent in sticking to the family's system of who speaks what language to whom in which situation. Includes a list of internet resources which may be out of date already.

    • Raising Multilingual Children: Foreign Language Acquisition and Children, by Tracey Tokuhama-Espinosa. ISBN: 0897897501.

    • Written by a bilingual (English-Spanish) who has taught in international schools in Japan, Ecuador and France, and who gives workshops on raising multilingual children to schools and families in Switzerland and France. She evaluates some of the research in linguistics and education, and reinterprets the findings in her own way. The best part of the book is the case studies, and a list of ten 'key-factors' (most of them given above in the 'Answer' part of this entry) for raising children to be multilingual. Strong emphasis on parents and teachers finding their own answers for their own situations. Includes a description of various stages in a child's linguistic development, with indicators to help you identify the stage your child is in.

    • The Care and Education of Young Bilinguals: An Introduction for Professionals, by Colin Baker and Anne Sienkewicz. ISBN: 1853594652.

    • Primarily for teachers with bilingual children in their classrooms, or teachers of foreign language to young children. Parents interested in the schooling their children receive might want to read it.

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    About Bilingual Education
    If you are really interested in the debate about bilingual education (particularly in the USA), you might also be interested in the following titles:

    • Language, Power, and Pedagogy: Bilingual Children in the Crossfire: Bilingual Education and Bilingualism, 23. by Jim Cummins. April 2001. ISBN: 1853594733.

    • At War with Diversity: US Language Policy in an Age of Anxiety: Bilingual Education and Bilingualism, 25. by James Crawford. May 2001.

    • The entire Bilingual Education and Bilingualism series of publications contains lots of interesting studies.

    • Under Attack: The Case Against Bilingual Education, by Stephen D. Krashen. 1996. ISBN: 0965280829.

    • Krashen replies to the critics and discusses: Does the research show that bilingual education doesn't work? (No.) Is English in trouble in the USA? (No.) Are most parents and teachers against bilingual education? (No.) Will bilingual education work for languages other than Spanish? (A most emphatic Yes.) Is bilingual education actually good for English? (Yes!) Can bilingual education be improved? (Yes!)

      Lots of good stuff if you have to argue for bilingual education in your school system. See also Condemned Without a Trial: Bogus Arguments against Bilingual Education, by Stephen F. Krashen. 1999. ISBN: 0325001294.

    • One Child, Two Languages: A Guide for Preschool Educators of Children Learning English As a Second Language, by Patton O. Taboors. 1997. ISBN: 155766272X.

    • Mirror of Language: The Debate on Bilingualism, by Kenji Hakuta. 1987 (still in print). ISBN: 0465046371.


    • Educating Second Language Children: The Whole Child, the Whole Curriculum, the Whole Community, edited by Fred Genesee 1994 (still in print). ISBN: 0521457971.

    • Goes beyond teaching methodology to look at - as the title says the school, the family, and the community, in a discussion of academic and social success of children who speak a minority language.

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    About Bilingual Acquisition
    Those of you interested in the process of acquiring a second language and research into bilingualism might find the following of interest:

    • Language Processing in Bilingual Children, edited by Ellen Bialystok. 1991. ISBN: 0521379180.

      Essays in linguistics, psychology, and education, on how bilingual children cope with two language systems. Includes thoughts on how to develop educational curriculums when the school has a lot of bilingual children.

    • In Other Words: The Science and Psychology of Second-Language Acquisition, by Ellen Bialystok, Kenji Hakuta. 1995. ISBN: 0465032818.

      In addition to research into second language acquisition, also presents thoughts of sociological issues of cultural diversity and multilingualism. Lots of interesting information on how concepts of mind and self and culture affect language learning. Also points out that the globalisation of the world means that no country (including the USA) can afford a policy of monolingualism (English Only). Some discussions of what policy could be adopted to make societies stronger through taken advantage of their linguistic diversity. Interesting, but not much advice on raising multilingual children.

    • One Mind, Two Languages, edited by Janet Nicol. 2000. ISBN: 0631220984.

      Modern research in language processing, in persons (mostly adults) who speak more than one language. Includes research on ASL signers. Linguistic and psycholinguistic research. Probably only of interest to persons actually doing research in linguistics, psycholinguistics, applied linguistics, language teaching, cognitive science, and/or psychology.

    • Input, Interaction, and the Second Language Learner, by Susan M. Gass. 1997 (still in print). ISBN: 0805822097.

    There is also an International Journal of Bilingualism, and several online discussion groups for parents of bilingual children, as well as closed email lists you can get on by going through the chat groups.

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    Second Perspective

    Answers provided by Anthea Fraser Gupta, Senior Lecturer at the School of English, University of Leeds.


    Read this FAQ if you have questions like the following:


    Similar questions:
    Can my toddler learn a second language at home before starting school?
    Can my baby learn 2 or more languages at home?
    My spouse speaks language X and I speak language Y, can we teach our children both languages?
    My infant is a year old and has not learned to talk. Why not?
    Will I confuse my child if I mix languages?


    Don't worry; be natural; be a parent

    We get many questions from worried parents and prospective parents, often people who are in mixed marriages and are involved in migration. Children grow up in all kinds of bilingual or multilingual settings. My answer is always the same: do what comes naturally. Children suffer if they are unloved or treated cruelly. They do not suffer if their parents talk to them and play with them in only one language, or in two, or in three or four. Whatever languages you choose to speak with your children, and whatever languages they are exposed to in the wider community, they will deal with the situation as they grow up. You can do no damage to children through your linguistic choices.

    Although I agree with much of what Professor Ruuskanen says about this question, I would like to take a slightly different stance on one or two points. There are many kinds of multilingual settings: across the world it is probably more common for children to be raised in a bilingual family than in a monolingual one. Bringing up a bilingual child is ordinary, not unusual. My own experience of child bilinguals has been mainly in Singapore and India. In these countries (and many others, especially in Asia and Africa) speaking more than one language is taken for granted. Most children grow up in families where two or more languages are spoken, in communities where they hear many languages every day. Most parents were also brought up with two languages.

    However complicated your family linguistic situation is, relax with your children and do whatever comes naturally. It doesn't matter if they hear the same parent speaking several languages (that's normal life); it doesn't matter if people begin a sentence in one language and end in another. It DOES matter if you don't spend time with your children or are uneasy around them. Children are resilient, but they are sensitive to tensions of all sorts. Keep multilingualism low key and take things easy.

    You are not a teacher to your children. Your job as a parent is to raise a happy child interested in life and with the skills for living. You have to expose your child to the things that matter to you, and language is only a part of that. All children acquire language (except some with very severe disabilities) -- and children growing up in households where more than one language is spoken to them regularly will learn more than one language. You don't have to worry about it. You have to spend time with your children, playing with them, dressing and feeding them, doing art, singing, splashing around in water..... As you are doing this, talk however you like. Relax and have fun. Parents do not teach their children languages: you speak languages with them as part of daily life.

    Occasionally people have deliberately introduced a second language into the home even though they are not in a situation that would naturally lead to bilingualism. This is usually because they think it is a good thing to know more than one language from an early age. Some teach a language they learnt as a foreign language. Some even teach Latin. Some parents have taught their children 'Babysign' (see The National Literacy Trust for a very good discission of the pros and cons: http://www.literacytrust.org.uk/talk_to_your_baby/key_topics/1285_baby_signing), which is signed words based on natural sign languages. A child might enjoy learning a few phrases or words in another language without you having to sacrifice your normal linguistic practice. If you want to introduce a language deliberately, even on a larger scale, you probably won't do any harm. You do need to build a natural relationship with your child, however, in a language you are comfortable in: a child can sense artificiality. Also, unless you create a need for the language it's not likely to be very successful. Lots of things are good for children to learn (e.g. swimming, painting, clay modelling, horse riding, music) -- you can't do EVERYTHING, and there is no special magic in bilingualism. One situation where you probably ought to do something deliberate and use a language you are not good at -- if you have a profoundly deaf child and you do not know your local Sign Language, learn as much of it as you can and do your best to use it with your Deaf child.

    First of all, two definitions. The terms 'mother tongue' and 'native language' can mean many things. I will use them both to refer to a language that a person spoke before they started formal education (i.e. before the age of 3-7 years). Like most linguists I use 'bilingual' to refer to 'more than one language', regardless of whether it is 2 languages or 6.

    In Singapore nearly all children come to nursery school at age 3 already able to speak 2 languages. Many can speak 3. A child growing up with only one language is quite rare. The reason for this is that most adults routinely use two or three languages in their daily life, both at home and at work, and switching between languages is the norm for everyone. There are also many ethnic groups in Singapore, associated with many different languages, and people need to know languages which they can speak to people from other communities. Lots of people come from families where language shift has taken place, so that their best language might not be a language their parents spoke at all. Parents are fairly relaxed about their children hearing a rather rich language stew, and expect their children to pick up languages. They do worry (like parents everywhere) about their children being able to develop good skills in reading and writing the languages they have to do at school.

    In India, being able to speak only one language is a more common than it is in Singapore, but it is associated with some groups of poor people -- richer people are almost never monolingual (and many poor people are also multilingual).

    In both these places, bilingualism is not necessarily linked with biculturalism. English, for example, which is one of the languages usually spoken by bilinguals, is not associated with particular ethnic groups. English is a language of India and of Singapore -- it's not part of a foreign culture -- speaking with a UK or US accent would be seen as having a foreign accent. The pattern of bilingualism and the attitudes associated with it are quite different from attitudes in parts of the US and parts of Europe.

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    Will my child be bilingual? My husband and I both want our child to speak our (different) mother tongues, but we speak to each other in English and we live in a place where a fourth language is used -- what should we do?

    Most people who learn more than one language do so because they need to. Languages are worth learning if they are some use. That use can be practical, or emotional, or (for adults) aesthetic. If people need to learn a particular language, they generally will. Children are no different to adults in this respect. (Professor Ruuskanen also discusses this fact.) You can expect your child to learn a language if the child thinks it's some use.

    It's crucial to examine your situation and decide what language is most 'at risk' in your family. If you live in a place where there is a clear dominant language in the society, which is the language of the children your child will be playing with, or which is the language of education, you can be sure your child will learn that language. YOU don't need to worry about it at all. If you speak a language that is not used much in the community you live in, and especially if you use the dominant community language with your partner, you are going to have to work hard to develop your child's skills in that language, especially if you and your partner speak in the community's dominant language.

    And if you live in a place where there are lots of people who speak the same two languages, and where the child is exposed to Language X, Language Y, and all sorts of mixtures of X+Y, then you can relax. The chances are that the child will learn both of them. This is the usual experience for (for example) people growing up in educated families in Delhi -- they'll hear lots of Hindi and lots of English (and in some families lots of some other language(s) as well) and grow up with both, like most of their friends.

    Will bilingualism affect my child's intelligence? Is it true that only highly intelligent people can learn more than one language?

    Bilingualism certainly does not decrease intelligence and probably doesn't increase it either. There are bilinguals of all degrees of intelligence, just as there are monolinguals of all degrees of intelligence. And anyone able to acquire one language, even if they are far below average intelligence, is able to acquire more than one language.

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    Will hearing me speak more than one language confuse my child? Should I use the one-parent-one-language method?

    Children are not confused by hearing more than one language. We have known for a long time that bilingual children separate their language from the age of 2: current research suggests they separate them from the beginning.

    People who grow up in bilingual communities like Singapore take bilingualism for granted. Parents typically speak two or three languages to children, and parents and children often mix languages in the same sentence. Mixing languages in the same sentence doesn't confuse children. And if the child mixes languages it is not a sign of confusion. The children learn the complex rules for when to use which language (and when you can use a mixture). They start to demonstrate that they know these rules before they are 2 years old. By the age of 2 we can clearly see that bilingual children faced with a monolingual adult will do their very best to speak in the language the monolingual knows. But remember that a child will not have learnt the same words in both languages: if a child doesn't know a word in a language they want to speak, they may use a word from another language that means the same (many of us use the same technique as adults!): this is nothing to worry about. Indeed, it shows that the child knows how to translate. Don't worry about the child mixing, even if you never mix. You can expect it.

    The 'one-parent-one-language' method is sometimes put forward as the only way to raise bilingual children. It isn't. There are many routes to this end. If both parents can speak a minority language then their best strategy might be to speak only the minority language to their children, and let them learn the majority language of the community outside the home. If the family live in a place where everyone is bilingual in the same two languages, then they should behave naturally, switching languages and mixing them as they normally do.

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    Is the speech of bilingual children delayed? My 3-year old child makes a lot of mistakes in pronunciation and grammar: is that because she is bilingual?

    It used to be suggested that bilingual children were a little slower learning to speak than monolingual children. This is no longer an accepted view. In any case, any such difference would be very small. A bilingual child whose speech is delayed (for example, if they have not said the first word by 18 months) should be treated exactly like a monolingual child. It is dangerous to think that the child's speech is delayed because the child is bilingual. Bilingual children vary from one another just as monolingual children do -- some will be early and some will be late speakers. But all children whose speech is delayed should be assessed by a doctor and (if necessary) a speech-language practitioner, because if the child is deaf, or if there is some reason for the speech delay, it should be dealt with. If your child has hearing or speech-language problems, make sure that any professionals you deal with are supportive of bilingual families. Advice to switch to monolingualism is nearly always wrong advice.

    When children are learning to speak they make mistakes in all areas of language. A 'mistake', by the way, is something that adults in the community don't do (examples that work in all dialects of English include: calling a cat a 'dog'; beginning 'cake' with a /t/ sound; saying 'I wented'). 3 year olds have certainly not got it all sorted out. However many languages your child is learning, you can expect pronunciation mistakes, for example, until the age of 6 or 7 years. Don't expect 'perfection' from small children and don't fall into the teacher role of 'correcting' them.

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    I am worried that my child will learn my faulty pronunciation. I was educated in French and I am nor confident in my Mother Tongue: can I speak French to my child even though it is not my Mother Tongue?

    Professor Ruuskanen regards it as important that parents speak only their mother tongues to their children, in order to foster a native accent. I do not agree: parents should feel free to speak to their children in a language other than their mother tongue. I do think it is important to look after your children in a language in which you are confident, and in which you know a few songs and rhymes. In the communities in which I have studied bilingualism (including my own family), it is common for parents to speak languages they have learned at school to their children. As adults, many people's best language is not their native language, but a language in which they have been educated, and/or which is the dominant language of the community.

    Many people in bilingual communities or in mixed marriages need to speak to their child (at least some of the time) in a language which is not their native language. There is nothing at all wrong with doing this. Language shift (moving to a language which is not the language of your ancestry) is a normal part of human behaviour. Some parents worry that they will pass on an 'incorrect' accent to their children. Don't worry about this. Accents change over our childhood and adolescence, and in many people do not stabilise until the early 20s.

    Once children start mixing with other children (from the age of 2 or 3) they start to learn their accent from their friends. Parents soon discover that they are not the model for their children's language behaviour, any more than they are the model for their dress sense. Children acquire the language of the children's community they are in. Be prepared for this (you might not like it!).

    The hearing children of deaf parents often grow up bilingual too, learning a sign language at home. They begin to model their speech on their parents' faulty pronunciation, but as long as they spend about 10 hours with speakers of oral languages, they seem to have no problem learning an oral language as well, and become indistinguishable from their friends (except for remaining bilingual, of course).

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    My child refuses to speak our native language. My son just turns his back on me when I speak my language to him -- what should I do?

    As Professor Ruuskanen says, it is common for a child brought up in a place with a strong community language to reject a minority one. My own daughter, starting in a trilingual household, rejected everything but English when she was 2. When this happens it is because we have failed to provide the need for the language. In deciding on your reaction, you need think about your relationship with the child as well as about your desire for them to learn a language. My husband felt that he valued his relationship with her more than his language, and switched to English. Other people stick it out and sometimes the child ends up with a good knowledge. All of us have to accept that we cannot control our children's life experiences. They will be their own people and make their own life which will be different from our lives, and which will not be as we envisaged their lives would be. Accepting language shift is part of accepting generational differences. Don't try to control the environment too much, and if things go wrong, be accepting. Other things matter much more.

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    More Resources

    Journals that deal with issues of bilingualism and bilingual education

    International Journal of Bilingualism: A interdisciplinary journal that publishes research on the language behavior of bilinguals and multilinguals.

    International Journal of Bilingual Education and Bilingualism: Focuses on the education of immigrant children and other bilinguals within the United States, as well as some articles on bilingual education internationally.

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    Websites for Bilingual families

    An American Between Worlds: Blog by an American woman raising and homeschooling three bilingual children.

    Bringing Up Baby Bilingual: Blog discussing strategies and stories of teaching French to a toddler.

    Bilingual/Bicultural Family Network: A site with discussions, articles and resources for bilingual families.

    Being Multilingual: A thorough analysis of multilingualism and what being multilingual means.

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